Jesus told the disciples as he calmed the storm and they were in the boat afraid about what would happen, "O, you of little faith." They doubted his power to take on the storm, his presence with them, and trusting in who He really is. It took watching him physically calm and verbally tell the storm, "Be still."
If I am truly honest with myself, I find myself often in the same boat with these disciples. I forget who is really beside me. I forget who lives in me and is for me and is not against me, unlike the prince of this outer world. If I am really honest, I live in a state of fear because of some traumatic things I faced growing up at a young age over a long period of time into high school. The effects of all that went down in our family, is one that is not so easy to always face.
Its so much easier to numb the emotions from the past experiences of it and how it effects me now. Its easier to play the quiet game and to mask what really happend, to pretend our lives were normal and okay, when the truth is they were not normal times growing up and it was clearly not okay. It was a powerless and vunerable time as a child enduring the things that evoked and sadly instilled fear. But as an adult I know life does not have to be nor stay the way it did then. It takes some level of faith in Christ to believe that life can be different than the years spent this way, far different than the dysfunction of all I saw and felt.
It also takes faith, a mustard seed of faith God says, to connect to the pains of the past and really feel the pain in order to be healed of it, in order to be restored by God from it, in order to know His true peace, true joy, and true love...in order to really appreciate and understand the Gospel message of why God came. That is faith. And it takes walking through it with God in God's strength in order to overcome the fear that enslaves. So I am learning. God is stronger.
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